The Pillow

"Do you have a sword?" asked the old insane German man.
"No" I replied
"How don't you have a sword!" screamed the German man in obvious anger. He then drew out his sword, "I challenge you to a sword fight!"
"But I don't have a-" I said but was cut off
"Be a man and not wuss! Use a pillow!" he said tossing me a pillow. I realized how crazy he was so I grabbed the pillow, jumped on my horse and galloped to the nearest sports stadium with him on my tail. I had to lose him. I continually tried blending into the crowd but I think he had my scent because he walked like a blood hound, his nose to the ground. Suddenly I felt a hand on my shoulder. It was him.
"I challenged you to a sword fight!" he said
"Look man, can I just leave?" I asked
"No FIGHT MEEEEEEEEEEE!" he screamed and now people made a circle and cried "fight, fight, fight", they didn't know yet he had a sword. As he drew it the crowd scattered and screamed as I raised my pillow. he came at me sword drawn and so I swung my pillow as his blade broke. Within a second his face was close to mine so I smashed that with the pillow continually. He was eventually knocked out by the pillow. But suddenly they all attacked me. I suwng the pillow left and right and knocked more people out untill the cops came and arrested me for assault. And I later learned that every peice up untill the crowd attacking me was a sport. What a strange and bloody sport to play.